Marcus is less inclined to move to the next thing as her layers shed, listed back into the chair so that he can look at her some. So that he can rove his hands up her sides, map soft curves with a gentle sweep of his palm. Lowers that touch back down to her hips, at her behest, a flex and squeeze of fingers in sensitive places, the dip of bone and line of muscle.
Then, gentles more. Lets her up, with the skimming of his hands back down her thighs, no pressure for her to push back against.
Long enough that extricating herself from his grip and her balanced perch across his thighs and the rasp of his palms across her skin is a kind of wrenching loss.
But Derrica braces hands over his chest, uses him as leverage to shift her weight back and away, find her footing in the space between his splayed thighs. Here, her half-finished work is made plain: laces pulled loose but trousers more or less intact. The tie pulled loose dropped on the floor alongside his armor, his tunic, her bindings and shirt.
A smile warms her expression as she looks him over. Equal parts affectionate and wanting, making plain the warmth curling in her belly.
Instead of saying any of the things burning in her chest, her hands drop down to her own trousers. Picks free her own laces, shimmies the fabric down her hips to pool on the floor and step back to him.
“Take these off,” is a murmur of a suggestion, the only thing stalling her return to his lap.
There was just the beginning of a curling in at the shoulder that might suggest a different trajectory than her murmured suggestion. To follow what appeals, from what he can see to what he can touch to what he can taste. Her scars are less but still visible in warm lantern light and they make for tempting targets of his focus.
But, Marcus relaxes back that fraction. He would prefer her in his lap. He drags his focus back up to her face as his hands move to his waistband, tugging his trousers open further before lifting his hips the necessary amount to push fabric past them.
There, the scar he'd mentioned licks around his kneecap as he leans forwards just enough to shuck pants off the rest of the way, and then back. A hand reflexively skimming over himself, less a self-conscious thing than it is practical, instinctive, a light grasp of palm against thickened flesh. His other hand turns out, palm up, an offer for steadying her.
The offered hand is welcome, less for the support as she resettles herself across his thighs and more for the opportunity to lace their fingers together. Draw his hand to her mouth and kiss his knuckles softly as she maintains that sliver of distance between his body and hers.
“I like your hands,” cannot be any kind of revelation.
Or maybe it is, just slightly. It had been a dream, but Marcus had still used these hands within the reality conjured there. The memory of it lives somewhere in her body.
But Marcus has done much to dispel it. He has used his hands for much else in her company.
His fingers straighten to brush against her mouth, her cheek, in the wake of that kiss. Become more specific, feeling along the soft press of her lips, down her chin, the side of her throat.
"I like touching you," has that faint trace of humour—how convenient, for them both—but is also sincere.
Marcus' other hand is on her thigh, smooths up along the muscle of it, thumb pressing that little bit former against the inner softness. Lifts that one up, and the next touch comes in the form of the backs of his knuckles pressing low against her abdomen, in that warm space between them she's maintaining. Stroking over soft skin, towards where the soft lay of hair runs coarser.
Watching her face, all the while. He is not immune to the keeping of strict boundaries, especially where Derrica is concerned, but will breach them with even the slightest hint that such a thing is welcome.
Yes, there is some humor in that admission. When Derrica smiles, it is for both that and for the way he says it, the softness in his expression underneath the flicker of amusement.
And all the while, she is considering the boundaries she is enforcing. She is considering the work of his fingers, the way he is touching her. Derrica could encourage his hand downwards quite easily. Marcus has slipped part of the way already, is so very close he might be traveling the scant distance himself.
But she interrupts. It is a small movement, realigning the attention of his knuckles to the raised line slashed across her belly. To do this while guiding over the flat of his palm to the series of punctures gouged up thigh and hip that had lived just outside the roaming of his hand.
These two scars, the most noteworthy she has to offer, set out for his inspection.
There is a breath pulled in when the trajectory of his hand is altered, skirting impatience before convinced into better behaviour for virtue of
he had said he wanted to look at her. So he can do that, relax backwards with a flicked look up at her face—a subtle have it your way in the set of his expression, more mischief than complaint—before looking at where his hand has been directed. Thumb skimming over those raised ridges of scar tissue along her belly, first, feeling as well as touch.
"What was this one?" he asks, turning his hand, admiring this loose configuration they've made together.
"A blade," she answers, lifting her hand from his, his inspection permitted to carry on unimpeded. Her fingers fall to his forearm, holding there for balance as she leans back slightly on his lap. It shifts her weight back across the muscle of his thighs, creates some distance in which Derrica can observe him as Marcus looks at her. Her braid slips from her shoulder, hanging down her back.
There are other, lighter marks. Other places a blade has touched and cut deep enough to leave a mark. They are scattered, one here along her ribs, one there at her breast, one high on her arm.
"It was before I wore any armor. I didn't have my own."
They only make a path by chance, he thinks, but Marcus follows it anyway. Fingertips trailing across her skin, making gentle lines between this speckling of old hurts. Her ribs, over her breast, the backs of his knuckles then smoothing over the mark to her arm. He can hold two things to be true at once: one being, that he regrets she's been hurt, that she ever needed to start wearing armor at all.
The other is that there's something assuring and comfortable in the way she too bears marks, maybe even more than he, whether or not they're a little more discreet.
This thought, far removed from the instinct that has him ask, "The Annulment?"
The invocation of that occurrence bringing a chill to her body, one eased almost immediately by Marcus' hands.
"I was lucky," is made quieter by the way her breath has gone shallow. Her fingers slide up his forearm, thumb finding the bend of his elbow. "There was a templar who tried..."
Who has she told this to? Ilias. Julius. (Leander had seen her, and she had seen him, while the tower burned around them.) If anyone would understand, it must be Marcus. But there is still a moment, a trailing kind of hesitation as she watches him, breathing beneath the warmth of his fingers on her skin.
"I killed him. Before he could get to his dagger."
This trailed off comment has his attention hike back up.
It's a look that demands to know more, only gentles by degrees at the news that this man is dead. All the same. His hand settles at her arm, the other at her thigh, and the former slides up to her shoulder, over it, her neck. Brushes his thumb down her jaw.
"Tell me of it," he invites. It's open, such a prompt, to share whatever measure of it she'd prefer, but there is no small piece of him that would specifically like to know how she killed him too.
Her fingers curl more securely there at his elbow. Though she had been the one maintaining such strict space between them, the combination of Marcus' invitation and the path of his hand encourage her closer. Draws her a few scant degrees in towards him, until she braces here free hand over his chest. Her thumb runs back and forth there, fingers arrayed beneath the bare trace remaining of his earlier injury.
"They were killing us," is hardly necessary to reiterate; she has spoken of this to him, in his hearing, before. "Enchanter Iria had told me to run, so I cut across the courtyard. I thought I could hide in one of the store rooms. He must have seen me pass."
Foolish, in hindsight. Derrica has had much time to think of all the things she should have done differently.
"I'd never been Silenced before. It felt like I was suffocating."
Her fingers trace down his chest as she draws in a breath, shakes her head a little. Self-conscious over this admission, aware of the luxury she is expressing to him. Marcus had suffered in his Circle. Maybe he had been made very familiar with what Silencing felt like early in his life.
It might not have occurred to him, that any Circle mage—even that of Dairsmuid—would have gone any amount of time without having felt what that specific phenomenon was like. But surprise doesn't sketch out across his expression, only absorbing that information as his arm settles around her waist. Doesn't pull her in closer, just holds them both there.
It's how it should be.
"Smothering," is agreement. That's how it always felt to him. These are both better words than the one the Order, the Chantry, has chosen to call it.
The loop of his arm around her waist is grounding. Derrica is quiet for a moment. Lifts her hand from his chest to his jaw, fingers returning to the scar there.
"He was bigger than me," she tells him with a sort of grim humor. "He threw me across the hall once he caught up to me. No one had done that to me before either."
Self-conscious of this too: how little experience she'd had in combat, how little ability to defend herself. There had been a stretch of time where she had struggled with anger over these deficits. She'd been prepared for so many things, but never any of the things that happened that night.
Her fingers map the scar, looking at the line of his jaw rather than meeting Marcus' eyes as she tells him, "The armor was very cold, and very heavy when he pinned me. He was so sure of himself, he was smiling when he went to draw his dagger."
He lifts his chin as her fingers return to his scarring, tracing it. Not a discouraging cant, but a responsive action, inviting and allowing. This is a conversation about marks that are left behind, in all the ways that might imply.
The arm around her waist stays. His other hand, between them, seeks out where her own scattering of scars can be only just felt out with fingertips. Pausing when he finds one, stroking along it, considering its depth, before moving on to the next. She feels warm, and so does he, having come close enough to press the point, to have her, as invited.
Marcus turns his head, lips brushing against her fingers. Just that, before asking, "What did you do to him?"
Simple words, so plain as to obscure the nature of the action. How she had sobbed. How much blood had come of it.
Her thumb runs along his cheek, straying from scar tissue to stubble. Her breath hitches, goes shallower as his fingers move from one raised scar to the next along her skin. As his lips graze her fingers.
"It was the first time I'd done that."
Marcus will understand what this means, she is certain. Even if there is some quiet, self-conscious edge as she offers this up, this first time, this first life taken long after Marcus must have suffered much on his own, she has no doubt that he will know the weight of what she is trying to encompass here.
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no subject
Then, gentles more. Lets her up, with the skimming of his hands back down her thighs, no pressure for her to push back against.
no subject
Long enough that extricating herself from his grip and her balanced perch across his thighs and the rasp of his palms across her skin is a kind of wrenching loss.
But Derrica braces hands over his chest, uses him as leverage to shift her weight back and away, find her footing in the space between his splayed thighs. Here, her half-finished work is made plain: laces pulled loose but trousers more or less intact. The tie pulled loose dropped on the floor alongside his armor, his tunic, her bindings and shirt.
A smile warms her expression as she looks him over. Equal parts affectionate and wanting, making plain the warmth curling in her belly.
Instead of saying any of the things burning in her chest, her hands drop down to her own trousers. Picks free her own laces, shimmies the fabric down her hips to pool on the floor and step back to him.
“Take these off,” is a murmur of a suggestion, the only thing stalling her return to his lap.
no subject
But, Marcus relaxes back that fraction. He would prefer her in his lap. He drags his focus back up to her face as his hands move to his waistband, tugging his trousers open further before lifting his hips the necessary amount to push fabric past them.
There, the scar he'd mentioned licks around his kneecap as he leans forwards just enough to shuck pants off the rest of the way, and then back. A hand reflexively skimming over himself, less a self-conscious thing than it is practical, instinctive, a light grasp of palm against thickened flesh. His other hand turns out, palm up, an offer for steadying her.
no subject
“I like your hands,” cannot be any kind of revelation.
Or maybe it is, just slightly. It had been a dream, but Marcus had still used these hands within the reality conjured there. The memory of it lives somewhere in her body.
But Marcus has done much to dispel it. He has used his hands for much else in her company.
no subject
"I like touching you," has that faint trace of humour—how convenient, for them both—but is also sincere.
Marcus' other hand is on her thigh, smooths up along the muscle of it, thumb pressing that little bit former against the inner softness. Lifts that one up, and the next touch comes in the form of the backs of his knuckles pressing low against her abdomen, in that warm space between them she's maintaining. Stroking over soft skin, towards where the soft lay of hair runs coarser.
Watching her face, all the while. He is not immune to the keeping of strict boundaries, especially where Derrica is concerned, but will breach them with even the slightest hint that such a thing is welcome.
no subject
And all the while, she is considering the boundaries she is enforcing. She is considering the work of his fingers, the way he is touching her. Derrica could encourage his hand downwards quite easily. Marcus has slipped part of the way already, is so very close he might be traveling the scant distance himself.
But she interrupts. It is a small movement, realigning the attention of his knuckles to the raised line slashed across her belly. To do this while guiding over the flat of his palm to the series of punctures gouged up thigh and hip that had lived just outside the roaming of his hand.
These two scars, the most noteworthy she has to offer, set out for his inspection.
no subject
he had said he wanted to look at her. So he can do that, relax backwards with a flicked look up at her face—a subtle have it your way in the set of his expression, more mischief than complaint—before looking at where his hand has been directed. Thumb skimming over those raised ridges of scar tissue along her belly, first, feeling as well as touch.
"What was this one?" he asks, turning his hand, admiring this loose configuration they've made together.
no subject
There are other, lighter marks. Other places a blade has touched and cut deep enough to leave a mark. They are scattered, one here along her ribs, one there at her breast, one high on her arm.
"It was before I wore any armor. I didn't have my own."
no subject
The other is that there's something assuring and comfortable in the way she too bears marks, maybe even more than he, whether or not they're a little more discreet.
This thought, far removed from the instinct that has him ask, "The Annulment?"
no subject
The invocation of that occurrence bringing a chill to her body, one eased almost immediately by Marcus' hands.
"I was lucky," is made quieter by the way her breath has gone shallow. Her fingers slide up his forearm, thumb finding the bend of his elbow. "There was a templar who tried..."
Who has she told this to? Ilias. Julius. (Leander had seen her, and she had seen him, while the tower burned around them.) If anyone would understand, it must be Marcus. But there is still a moment, a trailing kind of hesitation as she watches him, breathing beneath the warmth of his fingers on her skin.
"I killed him. Before he could get to his dagger."
no subject
It's a look that demands to know more, only gentles by degrees at the news that this man is dead. All the same. His hand settles at her arm, the other at her thigh, and the former slides up to her shoulder, over it, her neck. Brushes his thumb down her jaw.
"Tell me of it," he invites. It's open, such a prompt, to share whatever measure of it she'd prefer, but there is no small piece of him that would specifically like to know how she killed him too.
no subject
"They were killing us," is hardly necessary to reiterate; she has spoken of this to him, in his hearing, before. "Enchanter Iria had told me to run, so I cut across the courtyard. I thought I could hide in one of the store rooms. He must have seen me pass."
Foolish, in hindsight. Derrica has had much time to think of all the things she should have done differently.
"I'd never been Silenced before. It felt like I was suffocating."
Her fingers trace down his chest as she draws in a breath, shakes her head a little. Self-conscious over this admission, aware of the luxury she is expressing to him. Marcus had suffered in his Circle. Maybe he had been made very familiar with what Silencing felt like early in his life.
no subject
It's how it should be.
"Smothering," is agreement. That's how it always felt to him. These are both better words than the one the Order, the Chantry, has chosen to call it.
And that's all, listening.
no subject
"He was bigger than me," she tells him with a sort of grim humor. "He threw me across the hall once he caught up to me. No one had done that to me before either."
Self-conscious of this too: how little experience she'd had in combat, how little ability to defend herself. There had been a stretch of time where she had struggled with anger over these deficits. She'd been prepared for so many things, but never any of the things that happened that night.
Her fingers map the scar, looking at the line of his jaw rather than meeting Marcus' eyes as she tells him, "The armor was very cold, and very heavy when he pinned me. He was so sure of himself, he was smiling when he went to draw his dagger."
no subject
The arm around her waist stays. His other hand, between them, seeks out where her own scattering of scars can be only just felt out with fingertips. Pausing when he finds one, stroking along it, considering its depth, before moving on to the next. She feels warm, and so does he, having come close enough to press the point, to have her, as invited.
Marcus turns his head, lips brushing against her fingers. Just that, before asking, "What did you do to him?"
no subject
Simple words, so plain as to obscure the nature of the action. How she had sobbed. How much blood had come of it.
Her thumb runs along his cheek, straying from scar tissue to stubble. Her breath hitches, goes shallower as his fingers move from one raised scar to the next along her skin. As his lips graze her fingers.
"It was the first time I'd done that."
Marcus will understand what this means, she is certain. Even if there is some quiet, self-conscious edge as she offers this up, this first time, this first life taken long after Marcus must have suffered much on his own, she has no doubt that he will know the weight of what she is trying to encompass here.